Oh Bwother

A little client of mine was telling me about how his older sisters tease him. And then he asked me, "did you have older bwothers who teased you too?" Oh boy, did I ever have older bwothers who teased me. Let me tell you, the teasing was the easiest part of it. Let me take a stroll down memory lane together, shall we?

One day, Aaron (oldest) and Jason (middle) asked me (the sweet darling baby of family) to go play with them. RED FLAG!!!! (They never asked me to play with them. In fact, they hated it when I followed them around. ) I was only 6 years old so I didn't pick up on the red flag. And even if I had picked up on that red flag, I probably still would have went because I had a HUGE
crush on Aaron's best friend, Derek. Ohhh....Derek Jungling...curly brown hair and the sweetest dimples....drool. Needless to say, I went. Jason had said, "yeah, come with us, Shannon, we are going to chase gophers at the baseball diamond. that's why we have this twine with us." Yet another RED FLAG moment missed. Come on, what did I think we were going to do with the twine? Rope the gophers?

So, down to the baseball diamond we go on our bikes. I was trailing behind having the time of my life. My big, long, adorable pigtails flowing in the wind, grinning from ear to ear. It was the calm before the storm.

We hopped off our bikes and the boys (about 6 of them in total) were running all over the baseball diamond "looking for gophers". So, I started running around too. I didn't know what the heck I was supposed to be doing but, I just tried to continue looking cute for Mr. McCutie, Derek Jungling. All of the sudden, all the boys stopped in their tracks. And turned toward me. RED FLAG. They set off in a wild sprint toward me. Or was there a gopher behind me? Nope, it was just me. They caught me and then I found out what the twine had been intended for....

Have you ever seen a calf being "hog tied" in a roping event? It looks kinda mean, huh. Well imagine an adorable little 6 year old girl instead. Yes, that was what the twine was intended for. Not to lasso gophers but to "hog tie" me. And to add insult to injury they didn't just leave me tied up on the ground- they fastened me to the chain-link fence! Yes, it was quite a traumatic event. After they ran away, I cried and cried. They of course didn't run very far. They hid behind some bushes and watched me wail away. Eventually, they did come and set me free.
I got on my bike and pedaled home as fast as I could, leaving a river of tears behind me. I knew I would get revenge on them and it would be doled out through one angry mommy and daddy. Tee, hee, hee.